1 00:00:01,088 --> 00:00:02,088 [Joyful song] 2 00:00:03,916 --> 00:00:05,456 Do you think you got enough sticky tabs? 3 00:00:05,483 --> 00:00:06,663 [Laughter] 4 00:00:06,745 --> 00:00:08,265 You see, this way, 5 00:00:08,356 --> 00:00:10,306 I can cross-reference all the stats that I need. 6 00:00:10,401 --> 00:00:12,011 All sports agents use tricks like this 7 00:00:12,099 --> 00:00:13,639 so they can stay ahead of the competition. 8 00:00:13,665 --> 00:00:14,965 See, yellow is for tennis. 9 00:00:15,058 --> 00:00:17,148 Ooh, you could be Mrs. Andy roddick. 10 00:00:17,234 --> 00:00:19,454 [Laughter] 11 00:00:19,541 --> 00:00:21,111 Green is for golf. 12 00:00:21,195 --> 00:00:23,365 Big Dee Dee: Mrs. Tiger Woods! 13 00:00:23,458 --> 00:00:24,678 He must be bored 14 00:00:24,763 --> 00:00:26,053 with that statuesque blond by now. 15 00:00:26,069 --> 00:00:27,199 [Laughter] 16 00:00:27,288 --> 00:00:29,068 And orange is for baseball. 17 00:00:29,159 --> 00:00:30,989 Mrs. Derek jeter. Ugh. 18 00:00:31,074 --> 00:00:32,294 [Laughter] 19 00:00:32,380 --> 00:00:33,900 Has a nice ring to it. 20 00:00:33,990 --> 00:00:35,990 Dee Dee jeter. Dee Dee jeter. Dee Dee jeter. 21 00:00:36,079 --> 00:00:37,339 [Laughter] 22 00:00:37,428 --> 00:00:39,648 Oh, I like that. Maybe I could meet him. 23 00:00:39,735 --> 00:00:41,255 Mona jeter. Mona jeter. Mona jeter. 24 00:00:41,345 --> 00:00:42,995 [Laughter] 25 00:00:43,086 --> 00:00:45,646 Doesn't have quite the same ring, does it? 26 00:00:45,741 --> 00:00:48,271 [Introductory theme song] 27 00:00:48,352 --> 00:00:53,232 ♪ through this journey of discovery ♪ 28 00:00:53,314 --> 00:00:57,754 ♪ you finding you I'm finding me ♪ 29 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,970 ♪ now that I have someone special ♪ 30 00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,851 ♪ who brings out the joy ♪ 31 00:01:02,932 --> 00:01:04,852 ♪ brings out the joy inside of me ♪ 32 00:01:04,934 --> 00:01:07,424 ♪ inside of me ♪ 33 00:01:07,502 --> 00:01:09,632 ♪ we can become whatever we want ♪ 34 00:01:09,721 --> 00:01:12,161 ♪ all we need is lovin' ♪ 35 00:01:12,246 --> 00:01:15,376 ♪ that's the way I feel it should be ♪ 36 00:01:15,466 --> 00:01:17,076 ♪ you and me ♪ 37 00:01:17,164 --> 00:01:19,914 [Off-key] ♪ me ♪ 38 00:01:19,992 --> 00:01:22,082 Ooh. [Ironic laughter] 39 00:01:23,779 --> 00:01:25,259 [Introductory musical note] 40 00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:28,383 [Mona thinking] I'm convinced there's a man out there 41 00:01:28,436 --> 00:01:30,346 to share my life with. 42 00:01:30,438 --> 00:01:32,828 If I just had the confidence to let someone get to know me, 43 00:01:32,918 --> 00:01:36,438 the real me, the one that, so far, only I know, 44 00:01:36,531 --> 00:01:38,791 - the woman who... - Spencer: Hey, Mona. Seen Adam? 45 00:01:38,881 --> 00:01:40,801 - He had a lunch date. - It's three o'clock. 46 00:01:40,883 --> 00:01:42,153 Well, he did come in early. 47 00:01:42,232 --> 00:01:43,762 He showed up at 11:45. 48 00:01:43,842 --> 00:01:44,972 [Laughter] 49 00:01:45,061 --> 00:01:46,851 Which, for Adam, is early. 50 00:01:46,932 --> 00:01:48,762 He left for lunch at noon. 51 00:01:48,847 --> 00:01:50,847 [Laughter] 52 00:01:50,936 --> 00:01:53,496 - He said he had a special date. - He says that about every date. 53 00:01:54,723 --> 00:01:56,683 Man, Adam's got a better social life than 54 00:01:56,768 --> 00:01:58,068 the two of us put together. 55 00:01:58,161 --> 00:02:00,251 Hello, dateless wonder twins. 56 00:02:00,337 --> 00:02:01,687 [Laughter] 57 00:02:01,773 --> 00:02:03,383 Can you cover the phones? 58 00:02:03,471 --> 00:02:05,141 I'm so tired I'm gonna take a nap in the grab room. 59 00:02:05,168 --> 00:02:06,558 [Laughter] 60 00:02:06,648 --> 00:02:08,648 Man, how are you pulling all these dates? 61 00:02:08,737 --> 00:02:10,567 Step into the millennium, people. 62 00:02:10,652 --> 00:02:14,312 I'm listed on 20 Internet dating sites. 63 00:02:14,395 --> 00:02:16,475 Male call, boy toy, 64 00:02:16,571 --> 00:02:18,831 and I'm really hot in the gay Jewish singles site, 65 00:02:18,921 --> 00:02:20,011 man-on-manischewitz. 66 00:02:20,096 --> 00:02:21,176 [Laughter] 67 00:02:21,271 --> 00:02:22,451 They think I'm taboo. 68 00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:25,880 But how are you getting so many hits? 69 00:02:25,971 --> 00:02:27,891 I wrote an incredible profile. 70 00:02:27,973 --> 00:02:29,453 [Gasps] You two should try it. 71 00:02:29,540 --> 00:02:31,330 Surely with some creative verbiage, 72 00:02:31,412 --> 00:02:33,002 you could dupe somebody into a first date. 73 00:02:33,022 --> 00:02:34,552 [Cheerful humming] 74 00:02:34,632 --> 00:02:37,372 Now for my nap. No calls, please. 75 00:02:37,461 --> 00:02:38,591 [Laughter] 76 00:02:39,637 --> 00:02:40,807 Dating online? 77 00:02:40,899 --> 00:02:42,549 [Scoffs] Seems a little desperate. 78 00:02:42,640 --> 00:02:45,170 - Yeah. Let's do it! - I'm down. 79 00:02:46,296 --> 00:02:47,856 But I'm doing it as a public service. 80 00:02:47,950 --> 00:02:49,210 Shouldn't hold back 81 00:02:49,299 --> 00:02:50,709 all this chocolate love from the ladies! 82 00:02:50,735 --> 00:02:52,555 [Laughter] 83 00:02:52,650 --> 00:02:54,170 Please don't ruin chocolate for me. 84 00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:56,475 [Introductory musical note] 85 00:02:57,699 --> 00:02:59,269 I know you've all heard the rumors 86 00:02:59,353 --> 00:03:00,623 that one of our superstars, 87 00:03:00,702 --> 00:03:02,142 Merlin DeMarco, has been sleeping 88 00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:03,785 with the wives of some of his teammates, 89 00:03:03,879 --> 00:03:06,139 and I just wanted to clear things up. 90 00:03:06,229 --> 00:03:08,709 - So, it's not true? - Oh, it's absolutely true. 91 00:03:08,797 --> 00:03:10,227 [Laughter] 92 00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:11,840 I just wanted to clear things up. 93 00:03:11,930 --> 00:03:13,370 Gonna need damage control. 94 00:03:13,454 --> 00:03:15,374 I've secured a sex therapist for Merlin, 95 00:03:15,456 --> 00:03:16,866 a marriage counselor for his teammates 96 00:03:16,892 --> 00:03:18,372 and a restraining order 97 00:03:18,459 --> 00:03:19,909 for anybody who wants to take it any further. 98 00:03:19,938 --> 00:03:21,938 On top of things as usual, Brett. 99 00:03:22,027 --> 00:03:24,987 So, Dee Dee, any ideas, questions? 100 00:03:25,074 --> 00:03:26,074 Ideas? 101 00:03:26,118 --> 00:03:27,898 [Laughter] 102 00:03:27,990 --> 00:03:30,860 Well, Gus, fellow agents, 103 00:03:30,949 --> 00:03:32,689 I've been watching the trends, 104 00:03:32,777 --> 00:03:35,077 and I've come up with something hot. 105 00:03:35,171 --> 00:03:36,871 Extreme sports. 106 00:03:39,306 --> 00:03:40,476 [Laughter] 107 00:03:42,134 --> 00:03:44,224 Should I tell her somebody already came up with that? 108 00:03:45,399 --> 00:03:47,309 I was just setting the tableau. 109 00:03:47,401 --> 00:03:50,231 Now, everybody knows Tony hawk, 110 00:03:50,317 --> 00:03:53,187 but nobody knows the kids who wanna be Tony hawk. 111 00:03:53,276 --> 00:03:55,926 Now, I've compiled an extensive list 112 00:03:56,018 --> 00:03:58,498 of 11 to 14-years-olds who are making noise 113 00:03:58,586 --> 00:04:01,416 in skateboarding, kitesurfing, heliskiing, snowboarding... 114 00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,552 Brett: Right, right, right. 115 00:04:03,634 --> 00:04:05,184 Our commission from that would certainly cover 116 00:04:05,201 --> 00:04:07,031 the morning bagels. 117 00:04:07,116 --> 00:04:08,376 Hey, maybe we could even get 118 00:04:08,465 --> 00:04:09,615 some of that flavored cream cheese. 119 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:11,690 [Laughter] 120 00:04:11,773 --> 00:04:13,863 Sure, there's not a lot of money in these sports, 121 00:04:13,949 --> 00:04:15,429 but there is a ton 122 00:04:15,516 --> 00:04:17,556 in video game development, product endorsement. 123 00:04:17,648 --> 00:04:20,298 I think gmg should aggressively go after 124 00:04:20,390 --> 00:04:22,520 the next generation of extreme sports stars. 125 00:04:22,610 --> 00:04:24,480 - Get them while they're young. - Yeah. 126 00:04:24,568 --> 00:04:27,088 - Like the cigarette companies. - Yeah. No! 127 00:04:27,179 --> 00:04:29,179 I meant before they hit it big, 128 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,919 but I'm glad you're paying attention. 129 00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:34,620 Could be interesting. Didn't we try that once? 130 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:36,839 Yes, we did, with that surfer Kelly Stokes. 131 00:04:36,928 --> 00:04:38,558 All of our resources went into wooing his parents. 132 00:04:38,582 --> 00:04:40,412 Ah, the drunk and the whore. 133 00:04:40,497 --> 00:04:42,407 [Laughter] 134 00:04:42,499 --> 00:04:43,999 Exactly, and we still didn't get the kid. 135 00:04:44,022 --> 00:04:45,892 It was a total waste of time. 136 00:04:45,981 --> 00:04:47,721 But, uh, how could you have known 137 00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:49,379 you were pitching a waste of time? 138 00:04:49,463 --> 00:04:50,773 You know, being new and all. 139 00:04:50,855 --> 00:04:52,725 [Laughter] 140 00:04:52,814 --> 00:04:54,824 Let's table this idea so I can think about it 141 00:04:54,903 --> 00:04:57,083 and make my tee time with mickelson. 142 00:04:57,166 --> 00:04:59,296 First one there gets to drive the cart. 143 00:04:59,386 --> 00:05:00,386 [Laughter] 144 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:04,780 What was that? 145 00:05:04,869 --> 00:05:07,049 Oh. Uhm, we just had a staff meeting 146 00:05:07,132 --> 00:05:08,482 where you pitched an idea 147 00:05:08,569 --> 00:05:10,349 that didn't really go over too well. 148 00:05:10,440 --> 00:05:12,050 [Laughter] 149 00:05:12,137 --> 00:05:14,137 In fact, you might want to go back in there 150 00:05:14,226 --> 00:05:15,676 and kill the crickets that are still chirping. 151 00:05:15,706 --> 00:05:17,226 [Laughter] 152 00:05:17,317 --> 00:05:18,667 I've never seen anyone act 153 00:05:18,753 --> 00:05:20,493 like that in a professional environment. 154 00:05:21,973 --> 00:05:23,803 Isn't this your very first job? 155 00:05:23,888 --> 00:05:25,498 [Laughter] 156 00:05:25,586 --> 00:05:26,976 Look, I can understand 157 00:05:27,065 --> 00:05:28,825 if you're feeling a little unsure of yourself. 158 00:05:28,850 --> 00:05:31,330 Being the only female in an all-male environment. 159 00:05:31,418 --> 00:05:33,218 Not that that's the only reason why you're here, 160 00:05:33,245 --> 00:05:34,595 but I'm sure it's something 161 00:05:34,682 --> 00:05:36,122 that you probably wondered about. 162 00:05:37,424 --> 00:05:40,044 - Actually, I haven't. - Then forget I spoke. 163 00:05:40,122 --> 00:05:42,602 - Did you say something? - I'm just trying to give you 164 00:05:42,690 --> 00:05:44,210 the benefit of my knowledge, Dee Dee. 165 00:05:44,300 --> 00:05:46,000 Don't be so generous next time, Brett. 166 00:05:47,651 --> 00:05:50,181 [Laughs] Fine, if you're not interested in learning. 167 00:05:51,699 --> 00:05:53,309 [High-pitched voice] Cricket. Cricket. 168 00:05:53,396 --> 00:05:55,216 [Laughter] 169 00:05:55,311 --> 00:05:56,701 [Introductory musical note] 170 00:05:56,791 --> 00:05:58,401 [Knock, door opens] 171 00:05:58,488 --> 00:06:00,228 Ok. Finished with my profile. 172 00:06:00,316 --> 00:06:02,796 Me, too. I'll show you mine, if you show me yours. 173 00:06:02,884 --> 00:06:04,454 If I had a nickel for every time 174 00:06:04,538 --> 00:06:05,908 - a woman said that to me... - You'd have a nickel. 175 00:06:05,930 --> 00:06:07,850 [Laughter] 176 00:06:07,932 --> 00:06:08,932 Now gimme. 177 00:06:10,718 --> 00:06:13,288 Boy, this is just a list of lies. 178 00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:15,593 The celebrity you most resemble: The rock? 179 00:06:15,679 --> 00:06:17,679 [Laughter] 180 00:06:17,768 --> 00:06:19,898 You drive a Porsche? You speak Portuguese? 181 00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:21,638 [Laughter] 182 00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:23,339 You have to get 'em on the hook, Mona. 183 00:06:23,426 --> 00:06:24,596 Well, what are you gonna do 184 00:06:24,688 --> 00:06:26,168 if you meet a girl from Portugal? 185 00:06:26,255 --> 00:06:27,835 I'll just tell I'm from the south side of Lisbon. 186 00:06:27,865 --> 00:06:29,385 [Laughter] 187 00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:31,646 And when you walk in not looking like the rock, 188 00:06:31,739 --> 00:06:33,569 she's gonna know you no hablaportuguese. 189 00:06:34,655 --> 00:06:37,605 So I embellished. But your profile is Booty. 190 00:06:39,007 --> 00:06:40,567 And not the good kind. 191 00:06:40,661 --> 00:06:43,231 I mean, nowhere do you mention you've got big ones. 192 00:06:43,315 --> 00:06:45,005 [Laughter] 193 00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:46,280 Hey, baby. Hey, Spencer. 194 00:06:46,362 --> 00:06:47,892 - Hey. - Ma. 195 00:06:47,972 --> 00:06:49,952 Read this dating profile and tell me what you think. 196 00:06:49,974 --> 00:06:53,204 Mmm. Looks like the rock and loves to cuddle. 197 00:06:53,282 --> 00:06:54,892 You don't hook up with him, I might. 198 00:06:54,979 --> 00:06:56,289 [Laughter] 199 00:06:56,372 --> 00:06:58,292 Ma, meet your dream man. 200 00:06:58,374 --> 00:06:59,644 [Laughter] 201 00:07:01,595 --> 00:07:03,155 Spencer, 202 00:07:03,248 --> 00:07:05,728 somebody put a stop payment on your reality check. 203 00:07:05,816 --> 00:07:06,816 [Laughter] 204 00:07:08,036 --> 00:07:09,466 You know, I could've written 205 00:07:09,559 --> 00:07:11,079 a better profile for you than you did. 206 00:07:11,169 --> 00:07:13,429 Hmm. I was thinking the same thing about yours. 207 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:14,870 Ok. You're on. 208 00:07:14,956 --> 00:07:16,256 But I still can't believe 209 00:07:16,348 --> 00:07:17,668 you don't think this'll get me a date. 210 00:07:17,698 --> 00:07:19,348 Well, it might till you pick her up 211 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,739 in your rusted-out Malibu. 212 00:07:20,831 --> 00:07:22,401 [Laughter] 213 00:07:22,485 --> 00:07:24,485 And you have to drive around the block in reverse. 214 00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:26,974 [Laughs] And she has to keep the door closed 215 00:07:27,055 --> 00:07:28,225 with the seat belt. 216 00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:29,317 It's a cutlass. 217 00:07:29,405 --> 00:07:30,795 [Laughter] 218 00:07:30,885 --> 00:07:33,185 And you're never riding in it again. 219 00:07:33,278 --> 00:07:34,848 Aww. I'm gonna miss that lawn chair 220 00:07:34,932 --> 00:07:35,982 you call a front seat. 221 00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:37,074 [Laughter] 222 00:07:38,588 --> 00:07:40,018 Gotta get my look right. 223 00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:42,981 I want people at work to take me seriously. 224 00:07:43,071 --> 00:07:44,741 You know, coco's been having the same problem 225 00:07:44,768 --> 00:07:46,248 getting picked on in doggy day care. 226 00:07:46,335 --> 00:07:48,205 [Laughter] 227 00:07:48,293 --> 00:07:51,173 That's why I bought her an all-new wardrobe. 228 00:07:51,253 --> 00:07:52,953 Yeah, I bet that solved it. 229 00:07:53,037 --> 00:07:54,817 [Laughter] 230 00:07:54,909 --> 00:07:57,649 The proper wardrobe can salvage any situation. 231 00:07:57,738 --> 00:08:00,088 In fact, it was a sporty bolero and Ruby stilettos 232 00:08:00,175 --> 00:08:01,585 that got me across the Mexican border 233 00:08:01,611 --> 00:08:02,961 before Botox was legal. 234 00:08:03,047 --> 00:08:04,047 [Laughter] 235 00:08:06,137 --> 00:08:07,307 [Louder laughter] 236 00:08:09,532 --> 00:08:11,492 Mom, have you been drinking? 237 00:08:12,970 --> 00:08:13,970 Well, of course. 238 00:08:14,058 --> 00:08:15,058 [Laughter] 239 00:08:16,452 --> 00:08:17,802 Do you think I would dress 240 00:08:17,888 --> 00:08:19,078 my dog like this if I was sober? 241 00:08:19,107 --> 00:08:20,237 [Laughter] 242 00:08:22,023 --> 00:08:23,683 Brett just had to remind me 243 00:08:23,764 --> 00:08:25,554 that I'm the only woman at the firm, 244 00:08:25,635 --> 00:08:27,505 so I don't wanna dress too provocatively. 245 00:08:27,594 --> 00:08:29,864 Ahh, too short, too short, too short. 246 00:08:29,944 --> 00:08:31,644 Ah, here it is. 247 00:08:31,728 --> 00:08:33,858 I was saving this for my first murder trial, 248 00:08:33,948 --> 00:08:36,298 but I think I may need it for my first office beat-down. 249 00:08:36,385 --> 00:08:38,075 [Laughter] 250 00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:40,779 Dee Dee, why are you letting this Brett guy get to you? 251 00:08:40,868 --> 00:08:43,438 I don't know. He's got Gus' ear, 252 00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:45,873 and he points out the flaws in everything I do. 253 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,530 Oh, like when you and I 254 00:08:47,614 --> 00:08:49,224 were first starting to know each other 255 00:08:49,311 --> 00:08:50,701 and you pointed out all my flaws. 256 00:08:52,314 --> 00:08:54,324 I wasn't sure if I wanted to hug you or slug you. 257 00:08:54,403 --> 00:08:55,843 [Laughter] 258 00:08:55,926 --> 00:08:57,796 But the important thing is that over time, 259 00:08:57,885 --> 00:09:00,885 it worked out, so just relax. 260 00:09:00,975 --> 00:09:02,235 You wanted to hit me? 261 00:09:02,324 --> 00:09:03,764 [Laughter] 262 00:09:03,847 --> 00:09:05,197 I said I wasn't sure. 263 00:09:05,283 --> 00:09:06,633 [Laughter] 264 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:08,070 I'm still thinkin' about it. 265 00:09:08,156 --> 00:09:10,106 [Laughter] 266 00:09:10,201 --> 00:09:11,331 [Introductory musical note] 267 00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:15,162 Gus, Brett. 268 00:09:16,599 --> 00:09:18,249 [Laughter] 269 00:09:18,340 --> 00:09:20,260 I've got news. 270 00:09:20,342 --> 00:09:22,822 My manicurist told me that her boyfriend's sister 271 00:09:22,910 --> 00:09:24,780 was on the treadmill next to a trainer 272 00:09:24,868 --> 00:09:26,868 on a cell phone talking to kadeem Jennings. 273 00:09:26,957 --> 00:09:28,867 Kadeem just left his agent. 274 00:09:30,308 --> 00:09:32,828 That's... that's very good detective work, Dee Dee. 275 00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,250 But if you'd been watching sportscenter 276 00:09:34,269 --> 00:09:35,659 like I was at 3:00 am, 277 00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:36,989 you would've found this out a lot sooner. 278 00:09:37,011 --> 00:09:38,491 [Laughter] 279 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,798 Well, anybody can watch TV. 280 00:09:40,884 --> 00:09:42,674 [Laughter] 281 00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:44,816 Actually, Dee Dee, Brett and I were just discussing kadeem. 282 00:09:44,845 --> 00:09:46,235 I'd like to land him before 283 00:09:46,324 --> 00:09:47,804 my backstabbing ex-partner does. 284 00:09:47,891 --> 00:09:50,111 Well, I'd love to go after kadeem for you, sir. 285 00:09:50,198 --> 00:09:51,898 Your eagerness is so appreciated, Dee Dee, 286 00:09:51,982 --> 00:09:53,342 but I already started working on it 287 00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:54,545 at 3:05 this morning. 288 00:09:54,637 --> 00:09:56,327 [Laughter] 289 00:09:56,421 --> 00:09:58,361 - You know what I'm thinking? - I know what he's thinking. 290 00:09:58,380 --> 00:09:59,950 I'm thinking of pairing you two up. 291 00:10:00,991 --> 00:10:02,451 Are you sure that's what you're thinking? 292 00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:04,041 [Laughter] 293 00:10:04,125 --> 00:10:06,015 'Cause I'm thinking you wouldn't be thinking that 294 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:07,480 if you were really thinking about it. 295 00:10:08,651 --> 00:10:09,701 Brett's right. 296 00:10:09,783 --> 00:10:11,183 We wouldn't make a very good team. 297 00:10:11,262 --> 00:10:13,482 Dee Dee, you're a really creative raw talent, 298 00:10:13,569 --> 00:10:15,399 and I want you to learn from the best, 299 00:10:15,484 --> 00:10:17,054 so let's get this done. 300 00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:19,008 Unless either one of you would care 301 00:10:19,096 --> 00:10:21,096 to question my judgment again. 302 00:10:21,185 --> 00:10:22,665 Anybody? 303 00:10:22,752 --> 00:10:23,752 Didn't think so. 304 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:24,840 [Laughter] 305 00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,276 [Scoffs] I knew we were in trouble 306 00:10:28,366 --> 00:10:29,806 when you walked in here in that skirt 307 00:10:29,890 --> 00:10:32,460 - that covered your knees. - [Laughter] 308 00:10:32,544 --> 00:10:33,724 Well, brace yourself, 309 00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:35,237 because tomorrow I'm wearing pants. 310 00:10:35,330 --> 00:10:36,510 [Laughter] 311 00:10:38,899 --> 00:10:40,599 [Mimicking Dee Dee] Pants. Tomorrow. 312 00:10:40,683 --> 00:10:41,683 [Laughter] 313 00:10:42,685 --> 00:10:43,765 My pants on. 314 00:10:43,860 --> 00:10:45,040 [Introductory musical note] 315 00:10:48,038 --> 00:10:50,128 So how do I look on paper? 316 00:10:50,214 --> 00:10:51,264 I'd do ya. 317 00:10:51,346 --> 00:10:53,166 [Laughter] 318 00:10:53,261 --> 00:10:54,831 A high compliment indeed. 319 00:10:56,307 --> 00:10:58,657 And other than spelling, grammar and punctuation, 320 00:10:58,745 --> 00:11:01,525 I think Spencer captured you quite nicely. 321 00:11:01,617 --> 00:11:03,157 Although I don't really think you needed to put 322 00:11:03,184 --> 00:11:04,624 temperamental in caps. 323 00:11:04,707 --> 00:11:05,927 [Laughter] 324 00:11:06,013 --> 00:11:07,883 Temperamental? Give me that damn thing! 325 00:11:07,971 --> 00:11:09,231 [Laughter] 326 00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:10,970 Keep the caps. Add an exclaim. 327 00:11:11,061 --> 00:11:12,721 [Laughter] 328 00:11:12,802 --> 00:11:15,242 Spencer, I'm counting on you to help me find someone. 329 00:11:15,326 --> 00:11:17,976 Me, too. And you've barely written a thing. 330 00:11:18,068 --> 00:11:19,308 What happened to the stuff I gave you, 331 00:11:19,330 --> 00:11:21,030 like "thick Teddy bear" 332 00:11:21,115 --> 00:11:22,215 and the fact I just finished reading Moby dick? 333 00:11:22,246 --> 00:11:23,246 [Laughter] 334 00:11:23,334 --> 00:11:25,644 Come on. Test me. 335 00:11:25,728 --> 00:11:27,118 Ask me what kind of fish he is. 336 00:11:28,557 --> 00:11:31,687 I am not putting anything about Moby dickin your profile. 337 00:11:31,778 --> 00:11:33,298 Yeah. That kind of bragging only 338 00:11:33,388 --> 00:11:34,818 gets you dates on my websites. 339 00:11:34,911 --> 00:11:36,041 [Laughter] 340 00:11:36,130 --> 00:11:37,440 [Introductory musical note] 341 00:11:38,654 --> 00:11:41,144 Name the top 3 all-time leading rushers in the NFL. 342 00:11:41,222 --> 00:11:43,202 Emmett Smith, Walter Payton, Barry Sanders. In that order. 343 00:11:43,224 --> 00:11:45,364 - Next. - Give me some basics on Brady. 344 00:11:45,443 --> 00:11:47,273 Starting quarterback for new england, 345 00:11:47,358 --> 00:11:48,638 holds the super bowl record for pass completions, 346 00:11:48,664 --> 00:11:50,144 and in 2002, 347 00:11:50,231 --> 00:11:51,641 one of people magazine's most beautiful people. 348 00:11:51,667 --> 00:11:53,097 Which I personally agree with. Next. 349 00:11:53,190 --> 00:11:56,020 Ok, who sang the national anthem 350 00:11:56,106 --> 00:11:57,716 - at super bowl xxv? - Mariah Carey. 351 00:11:57,804 --> 00:11:59,244 [Buzzer] 352 00:11:59,327 --> 00:12:00,627 [Laughter] 353 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:02,940 Wrong. Whitney Houston. 354 00:12:03,026 --> 00:12:05,376 You're enjoying that buzzer a little too much. 355 00:12:05,463 --> 00:12:06,603 [Buzzer] 356 00:12:06,682 --> 00:12:08,162 [Laughter] 357 00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,079 Wrong. I'm enjoying it a lot. 358 00:12:10,164 --> 00:12:11,514 [Laughter] 359 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,170 Dee Dee, I think I'm done for the night. 360 00:12:13,254 --> 00:12:16,344 No! I need to be far more prepared than Brett 361 00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:18,261 for our meeting with kadeem Jennings, 362 00:12:18,346 --> 00:12:20,516 who by the way, set the NFL single-season record 363 00:12:20,609 --> 00:12:22,699 with 2,691 all-purpose yards 364 00:12:22,785 --> 00:12:25,745 896 receiving, 661 punt return, 365 00:12:25,832 --> 00:12:29,232 1,133 kickoffs, and one rushing yard. 366 00:12:29,313 --> 00:12:30,313 [Laughter] 367 00:12:32,490 --> 00:12:34,570 - You seem a little tense. - Don't tell me I'm tense! 368 00:12:34,623 --> 00:12:36,193 [Laughter] 369 00:12:36,277 --> 00:12:38,977 Stress is the glue that holds me together. Next. 370 00:12:39,062 --> 00:12:40,152 [Buzzer] 371 00:12:41,325 --> 00:12:43,165 How can I be wrong? Nobody asked me a question. 372 00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:45,220 I just think your whole attitude 373 00:12:45,242 --> 00:12:47,112 is wrong right now. 374 00:12:47,201 --> 00:12:48,461 [Introductory musical note] 375 00:12:49,594 --> 00:12:51,074 I'm telling you, kadeem mentions 376 00:12:51,161 --> 00:12:53,031 the small town where he grew up 377 00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:54,770 every time he does an interview, 378 00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:57,431 so we propose the kadeem Jennings foundation. 379 00:12:57,515 --> 00:12:59,685 - Not new. - Not finished. 380 00:12:59,779 --> 00:13:01,609 It'd fund sports programs and scholarships 381 00:13:01,693 --> 00:13:03,043 for the children of Springfield, 382 00:13:03,130 --> 00:13:04,870 and, before you interrupt me again, 383 00:13:04,958 --> 00:13:07,528 we'd negotiate the money on top of kadeem's contract. 384 00:13:07,612 --> 00:13:09,882 He'll see how innovative we are and sign with us. 385 00:13:09,963 --> 00:13:11,053 It's not a bad idea, 386 00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:12,748 but I'm gonna go a different way, 387 00:13:12,835 --> 00:13:15,065 - and you're gonna be impressed. - You mean like I am now? 388 00:13:15,098 --> 00:13:16,618 [Laughter] 389 00:13:16,708 --> 00:13:18,278 - [Chuckles] - Look, Brett, I know 390 00:13:18,362 --> 00:13:20,172 that you've been doing this longer than I ha... 391 00:13:20,190 --> 00:13:22,280 [stammers] Doing this? 392 00:13:22,366 --> 00:13:23,406 [Laughter] 393 00:13:24,934 --> 00:13:27,054 I don't really think you understand who I am, Dee Dee. 394 00:13:27,894 --> 00:13:29,424 When I was a kid, I brokered deals 395 00:13:29,504 --> 00:13:30,854 in peewee football, 396 00:13:30,940 --> 00:13:32,590 wee-tees basketball, and any other sport 397 00:13:32,681 --> 00:13:34,291 that wouldn't let a kid like me play. 398 00:13:34,378 --> 00:13:36,418 I graduated from high school, and I started out 399 00:13:36,511 --> 00:13:38,251 in the mail room of Gus' first firm. 400 00:13:38,339 --> 00:13:40,449 When his former partner left and stole most of his clients, 401 00:13:40,471 --> 00:13:43,001 I was one of only two agents who stood by his side. 402 00:13:43,083 --> 00:13:47,573 I have brokered $269.9 million worth of deals, 403 00:13:47,652 --> 00:13:50,052 a feat no one else the age of 30 has ever accomplished. 404 00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:51,743 So you see, I just don't "do this." 405 00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:54,181 I live this. I breathe this. 406 00:13:54,268 --> 00:13:55,618 I am this. 407 00:13:55,704 --> 00:13:56,704 [Laughter] 408 00:14:00,056 --> 00:14:01,056 [Laughter] 409 00:14:03,886 --> 00:14:05,946 The next time you practice that speech in the mirror, 410 00:14:05,975 --> 00:14:07,925 -and don't deny that you have, -[Scoffs] 411 00:14:08,021 --> 00:14:09,371 You might want to add 412 00:14:09,457 --> 00:14:11,067 some hand gestures for emphasis. 413 00:14:11,154 --> 00:14:12,814 It'll keep people awake that way. 414 00:14:12,895 --> 00:14:13,975 [Laughter] 415 00:14:15,071 --> 00:14:17,161 - The freshman has fire. - Dee Dee: Yes, she does, 416 00:14:17,247 --> 00:14:19,377 and I'm here to be a part of this business. 417 00:14:19,467 --> 00:14:21,297 If I wanted to be treated like an assistant, 418 00:14:21,382 --> 00:14:22,912 I'd take a job as your secretary. 419 00:14:22,992 --> 00:14:24,122 I could use a new one. 420 00:14:24,211 --> 00:14:25,821 I take my coffee strong and black. 421 00:14:25,908 --> 00:14:27,798 Well, you're gonna take your partner that way, too. 422 00:14:27,823 --> 00:14:29,003 [Audience cheers] 423 00:14:30,347 --> 00:14:31,647 How's my new team doing? 424 00:14:31,740 --> 00:14:33,090 - Great. Workin' it out. - Cool. 425 00:14:33,176 --> 00:14:34,346 Don't lie to me. 426 00:14:34,438 --> 00:14:35,438 [Laughter] 427 00:14:35,483 --> 00:14:36,533 Just get kadeem. 428 00:14:37,659 --> 00:14:39,309 [Brett sighs] 429 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:42,010 Look, Brett, I'm sure that someone helped you 430 00:14:42,098 --> 00:14:44,748 when you first got started, and I need that from you. 431 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:46,190 And I need you to trust me 432 00:14:46,276 --> 00:14:48,406 to make this kadeem deal happen. 433 00:14:48,496 --> 00:14:49,886 - Fine. - Ok. 434 00:14:51,673 --> 00:14:53,853 Can I at least suggest monsoon as the place 435 00:14:53,936 --> 00:14:56,546 - for the three of us to meet? - You can suggest that, 436 00:14:56,634 --> 00:14:58,944 but kadeem and I are going to the candy shop. 437 00:14:59,028 --> 00:15:00,768 The candy shop? That's a strip club. 438 00:15:00,856 --> 00:15:02,206 [Chuckling] Yeah. Yeah. 439 00:15:02,292 --> 00:15:03,772 [Laughter] 440 00:15:03,859 --> 00:15:05,729 Actually, technically, it's a gentlemen's club, 441 00:15:05,817 --> 00:15:07,337 and where kadeem wanted to meet, 442 00:15:07,428 --> 00:15:10,778 so that's where we'll be meeting, us gentlemen. 443 00:15:10,866 --> 00:15:12,086 I'll tell you what, though. 444 00:15:13,260 --> 00:15:14,870 I'll give kadeem a stack of ones, 445 00:15:14,957 --> 00:15:16,277 and I'll tell him they're from you. 446 00:15:16,306 --> 00:15:17,306 [Laughter] 447 00:15:18,700 --> 00:15:20,480 So, do you like what I wrote about you? 448 00:15:20,571 --> 00:15:22,751 Hmm. Well, it is accurate. 449 00:15:22,834 --> 00:15:24,424 I was just hoping for a description like, 450 00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:25,575 "big hands, big feet, 451 00:15:25,663 --> 00:15:27,403 four big reasons you want to meet." 452 00:15:27,491 --> 00:15:28,711 [Laughter] 453 00:15:28,797 --> 00:15:30,227 Some things should be left unsaid, 454 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:31,600 like the things you tend to say. 455 00:15:31,626 --> 00:15:33,626 [Laughter] 456 00:15:33,715 --> 00:15:35,585 What kind of woman is gonna respond to: 457 00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:37,593 "Passionate man seeks drama-free, 458 00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,155 intellectually stimulating woman 459 00:15:39,242 --> 00:15:40,552 for simple good times"? 460 00:15:40,635 --> 00:15:42,285 I don't need my intellect stimulated. 461 00:15:42,376 --> 00:15:43,546 I've got big feet. 462 00:15:43,638 --> 00:15:44,678 [Laughter] 463 00:15:44,769 --> 00:15:46,159 Ok, come on, Spencer. 464 00:15:46,249 --> 00:15:47,309 You said you wanted to change your image, 465 00:15:47,337 --> 00:15:48,897 I'm just trying to help you. 466 00:15:48,991 --> 00:15:51,211 You are gonna find the good, honest woman you deserve, 467 00:15:51,298 --> 00:15:52,818 based on the English-speaking 468 00:15:52,908 --> 00:15:54,738 bucket-driving, sweet-ass man that you are. 469 00:15:54,823 --> 00:15:56,043 [Laughter] 470 00:15:56,129 --> 00:15:57,299 Good, honest woman, huh? 471 00:15:59,088 --> 00:16:01,308 I guess honest wouldn't be bad. 472 00:16:01,395 --> 00:16:03,265 As long as she has a pinch of freak. 473 00:16:03,353 --> 00:16:04,353 [Laughter] 474 00:16:05,529 --> 00:16:06,849 So, what do you think about yours? 475 00:16:06,922 --> 00:16:08,792 Oh, it's really nice. 476 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:11,750 "Fiercely loyal, exceptionally creative, and..." 477 00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:13,360 Do you really think I have great legs? 478 00:16:13,450 --> 00:16:15,580 [Scoffs] Oh, yeah. Wearing those frankenboots 479 00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,150 has done wonders for your calves. 480 00:16:17,237 --> 00:16:18,627 [Laughter] 481 00:16:18,716 --> 00:16:20,716 After reading this, even I'd want to meet me. 482 00:16:21,763 --> 00:16:23,813 You know, sometimes I forget how close we are. 483 00:16:23,895 --> 00:16:25,415 You really do know me. 484 00:16:25,506 --> 00:16:26,676 I can't wait to post this. 485 00:16:26,768 --> 00:16:28,508 [Soft song] 486 00:16:28,596 --> 00:16:29,826 [Mona thinking] So, I didn't exactly have the courage 487 00:16:29,858 --> 00:16:31,558 to post my profile yet. 488 00:16:32,687 --> 00:16:35,297 I'm just not strong enough for mass rejection. 489 00:16:35,385 --> 00:16:36,775 But Spencer did such a nice job, 490 00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:38,385 maybe I'll frame it 491 00:16:38,475 --> 00:16:40,475 and read it till I start believing it myself. 492 00:16:44,438 --> 00:16:45,958 [Animated song] 493 00:16:46,048 --> 00:16:47,878 Kadeem, you're the most important athlete 494 00:16:47,963 --> 00:16:48,963 in the NFL today. 495 00:16:49,008 --> 00:16:50,228 And I promise you, man, 496 00:16:50,313 --> 00:16:52,053 I am gonna fight for you, all right? 497 00:16:52,141 --> 00:16:54,711 I will be a gladiator for you. 498 00:16:54,796 --> 00:16:56,926 My cell phone, which is always on, 499 00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:59,296 is off right now. You know why? 'Cause it's all about you. 500 00:16:59,366 --> 00:17:00,846 [Cellphone rings] 501 00:17:00,932 --> 00:17:02,112 [Cellphone beeps] 502 00:17:02,195 --> 00:17:03,325 Now it's all about you. 503 00:17:03,413 --> 00:17:05,023 [Laughter] 504 00:17:05,111 --> 00:17:06,721 Oh, that's nice. 505 00:17:06,808 --> 00:17:08,158 [Laughter] 506 00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:09,384 Brett: Dee Dee. 507 00:17:09,463 --> 00:17:11,473 Brett. Sorry I'm late, 508 00:17:11,552 --> 00:17:13,602 but I was picking up some quality Cubans 509 00:17:13,684 --> 00:17:17,044 from Michael Jordan's supplier to give to our newest client. 510 00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:19,563 Ahh. Sweet. It's monte cristo number 5. 511 00:17:19,647 --> 00:17:21,297 [Chuckles] 512 00:17:21,388 --> 00:17:23,258 I didn't expect to see you here. 513 00:17:23,346 --> 00:17:25,566 We, women, can just be so unpredictable. 514 00:17:25,653 --> 00:17:26,653 [Laughter] 515 00:17:27,655 --> 00:17:29,175 Now, kadeem, 516 00:17:29,265 --> 00:17:31,265 you know that these cigars are not the only way 517 00:17:31,354 --> 00:17:33,364 we're gonna take care of you at gmg, 518 00:17:33,443 --> 00:17:35,323 we'll also help you with wealth management, 519 00:17:35,402 --> 00:17:37,402 cultivate new global branding opportunities 520 00:17:37,491 --> 00:17:39,621 and get you the salary 521 00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:41,320 that your spectacular performance 522 00:17:41,408 --> 00:17:43,628 in the league demands. 523 00:17:43,714 --> 00:17:46,634 I like the way that sounds. Where you been hiding her? 524 00:17:46,717 --> 00:17:48,277 She's new. [Chuckles] 525 00:17:48,371 --> 00:17:50,771 She... was a secret. 526 00:17:50,852 --> 00:17:52,112 [Laughter] 527 00:17:52,201 --> 00:17:53,331 Weapon. 528 00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:55,470 Dee Dee Thorne, Brett's partner. 529 00:17:55,552 --> 00:17:58,342 His better half, if you will. 530 00:17:58,425 --> 00:18:00,815 And we've got big plans for you. 531 00:18:00,905 --> 00:18:02,945 Your own clothing line, action figures, 532 00:18:03,038 --> 00:18:07,428 energy drinks and, long term, you in tailored Armani 533 00:18:07,521 --> 00:18:10,921 anchoring the broadcasting booth at a major network. 534 00:18:11,002 --> 00:18:12,872 I do like Armani. 535 00:18:12,961 --> 00:18:14,531 [Laughter] 536 00:18:14,615 --> 00:18:16,655 But not as much at that thing Brett pitched 537 00:18:16,747 --> 00:18:18,267 about how to set up my foundation. 538 00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:19,358 That was fresh. 539 00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:23,012 You pitched my idea? 540 00:18:23,102 --> 00:18:25,062 Well, that's why you gave it to me, right? 541 00:18:25,147 --> 00:18:27,017 I mean, to... [chuckles] Get the client. 542 00:18:27,106 --> 00:18:28,926 And that would have done it, too. 543 00:18:29,020 --> 00:18:31,240 If I still needed representation. 544 00:18:31,327 --> 00:18:32,887 [Both] What? 545 00:18:32,981 --> 00:18:34,421 Well, see, I made peace 546 00:18:34,504 --> 00:18:36,424 with my old agent this afternoon. 547 00:18:36,506 --> 00:18:39,806 My family reunion's coming up, and he ismy uncle. 548 00:18:39,901 --> 00:18:41,081 [Laughter] 549 00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:42,903 But we put all this work into this. 550 00:18:42,991 --> 00:18:45,301 I studied the whole history of the NFL. 551 00:18:45,385 --> 00:18:47,735 I really am impressed with the two of you. 552 00:18:47,822 --> 00:18:49,522 And if I leave uncle Eddie again, 553 00:18:49,606 --> 00:18:50,906 hey, you'll be my first call. 554 00:18:50,999 --> 00:18:52,569 [Laughter] 555 00:18:52,653 --> 00:18:55,313 I'm supposed to meet my uncle at my aunt's soon. 556 00:18:55,395 --> 00:18:57,525 Oh, he's gonna love these Cubans. 557 00:18:57,614 --> 00:18:59,534 [Laughter] 558 00:18:59,616 --> 00:19:00,966 [Brett sighs] 559 00:19:01,052 --> 00:19:04,142 Well, that was a fool's journey. 560 00:19:04,230 --> 00:19:05,750 Don't call yourself a fool, Brett. 561 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:07,670 [Laughter] 562 00:19:07,755 --> 00:19:09,535 Even though you lost kadeem Jennings. 563 00:19:09,626 --> 00:19:12,326 Uh, I think you mean we lost kadeem Jennings. 564 00:19:12,412 --> 00:19:13,672 I just got here, remember? 565 00:19:13,761 --> 00:19:14,811 [Laughter] 566 00:19:16,242 --> 00:19:18,812 But you did get close because of my idea. 567 00:19:20,420 --> 00:19:21,940 Yeah. Right. 568 00:19:22,030 --> 00:19:23,680 Fine. 569 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:25,161 The cigars were a nice touch, too. 570 00:19:26,687 --> 00:19:28,037 All right, maybe you're not gonna 571 00:19:28,123 --> 00:19:29,913 - completely suck at this. - [Laughter] 572 00:19:29,994 --> 00:19:31,304 And maybe, you know, 573 00:19:31,387 --> 00:19:33,037 I won't stick my finger in a socket 574 00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:36,258 if, you know, Gus decides to pair us up together again. 575 00:19:36,349 --> 00:19:38,309 Well, thanks for the ringing endorsement. 576 00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:40,184 [Laughter] 577 00:19:40,266 --> 00:19:41,656 Yeah. You're welcome. 578 00:19:41,745 --> 00:19:42,915 [Laughter] 579 00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:45,270 Hi. 580 00:19:48,317 --> 00:19:50,617 You know, Dee Dee, this sports agenting business 581 00:19:50,711 --> 00:19:52,451 is gonna be a lot harder on you than I am. 582 00:19:52,539 --> 00:19:54,319 I think I can handle it. 583 00:19:54,410 --> 00:19:55,980 Which is why I'm gonna let you call Gus 584 00:19:56,064 --> 00:19:57,704 and tell him that you let kadeem get away. 585 00:19:58,371 --> 00:19:59,651 Dancer: Would you like a lap dance? 586 00:19:59,676 --> 00:20:01,066 No. No, no. I'm fine. 587 00:20:01,156 --> 00:20:02,896 [Laughs] You know what, though? She would. 588 00:20:02,984 --> 00:20:04,554 I'd what? 589 00:20:04,638 --> 00:20:05,638 [Laughter] 590 00:20:07,641 --> 00:20:10,031 Ooh, I like that sweater. 591 00:20:10,121 --> 00:20:11,431 Thank you. 592 00:20:11,514 --> 00:20:13,734 I picked it up yesterday at neiman's. 593 00:20:13,821 --> 00:20:15,171 Think they have it in my size? 594 00:20:15,257 --> 00:20:16,387 [Laughter] 595 00:20:16,476 --> 00:20:17,906 I'm sure. 596 00:20:17,999 --> 00:20:19,909 And you know, they have this necklace there 597 00:20:20,001 --> 00:20:21,701 that'd look great with those earrings. 598 00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:23,625 Ok, you guys have completely ruined this for me. 599 00:20:23,657 --> 00:20:25,087 [Laughter] 600 00:20:26,747 --> 00:20:28,577 [Introductory theme song] 601 00:20:28,627 --> 00:20:33,177 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0